The Guilty Voyeur

My role as a photographer is to take. I enjoy this but its a guilty pleasure that I often feel bad about doing. It feels selfish to take. I can justify a lot of it by saying, “they agreed to it,” or “if I tell their story, maybe it will help someone else,” or “maybe these photographs will help this person move on or see how beautiful they are or tell their story.” I say a lot of things but I’m often left feeling heavy or guilty or selfish…but fortunately, more than anything, I feel privileged and trusted.

I am working with a beautiful soul who has lived through more pain than any girl ever should and has made it to the other side now. She isn’t far removed from the tough stuff but she’s come a long way and won’t go back. Her scars tell their own story but I wanted to go deeper than the scars on her skin. I wanted to learn about the scars on her heart and in her head. The healing is just as impressive as the stories themselves. She is healing and growing and becoming. It’s amazing to watch and I am grateful for her trust.

For our “before the healing” shot, I asked her to paint a self portrait of the person she felt like when she was in the thick of the pain. We will follow up soon with a joyfilled photo of her in a happier place (where she is today)…but this is her yesterday…before.